Tuning into yourself is a key life skill

Where I grew up, a common rejoinder was: “If brains were chocolate, you wouldn’t have enough for 2 Smarties.” If the person in question was older/bigger – that observation would often be ‘shouted’ from a safe distance. It represented a light-putdown (most of the more robust putdowns are not publishable – in deference to your sensitivities).

Changed Understanding: Our understanding of what constitutes brains has moved on in recent years. We know about IQ (Intelligence Quotient) and we know about EQ (Emotional Intelligence). But, it’s a bit more complex than that. For example, in his book, Multiple Intelligences, Howard Gardner identified 7 different types of intelligence including (1) Visual-Spatial e.g. architects and sailors (2) Bodily-Kinesthetic like dancers and surgeons (3) Musical: sensitivity to rhythm and sound (4) Interpersonal: empathy for others & street smarts (5) Intrapersonal: in tune with inner feelings & intuition (6) Linguistic: using words effectively and (7) Logical-Mathematical: abstract reasoning & calculating. Some others have since added to this typology with ongoing debates around grouping and categorization. Bottom Line: our understanding of intelligence has broadened considerably.

Intrapersonal Expertise: Just recently, I had a savage dose of the ‘Man Flu.’ It went on and on and on – for a couple of weeks. But, there was no way I was admitting defeat AKA ‘going to the doctor.’ So, I battled on bravely, making life only marginally uncomfortable for Linda and the kids. Then I noticed that I was making small mistakes – an invoice calculated incorrectly, an email sent to the wrong ‘Tony’ and so on. Small stuff, nothing major. Then, on a quiet Saturday afternoon, there was a knock on the front door. The local police called to inform me that I’d pulled in for petrol at the Texaco garage on the Clontarf Road and had driven away without paying. With some embarrassment I had to drive down to the garage (to pay) and, later, drop a bottle of wine into the Garda station as an apology for causing the extra work.

Inner Tuning: At this point most people know that emotional intelligence is the ability to tune into other people – to get on their wavelength, to ‘pick up signals’ and respond appropriately. But, intrapersonal expertise, the ability to tune into yourself (see number 5 in the list above) is less well understood. Those ‘small’ mistakes are signals that all is not well. When you are functioning ‘under par’ you need to do something about it – before you get arrested for making a BIG mistake. Listen to your gut and respond accordingly. Before you continue with your mission to ‘save the world’ –  save yourself first.

Paul

PS Emotional Intelligence for Leading & Living: There’s an interesting leadership development program currently being offered by Cathy Buffini & Julia Rowan which essentially offers people ‘space’ to consider three big questions – Where you’ve come from:  Where you are today: Where you want to get to.  In a crazy busy world, these are questions worth addressing and it’s great to have an opportunity for someone to swim alongside as you work through these.  Contact Cathy on 086-8038583 or Julia on 086-8114481 for more information or check the following link: http://www.cathybuffini.com/the-leadership-space-workshop

Lighter Notes: Supplied by Aidan Cahill with his usual ‘sensitivity’ (decoded as follows ….”Hey, don’t blame me, I’m just taking the notes”).

Old Buddy: I called an old friend from Engineering College and asked what he was doing. He replied that he was working on “Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminum and steel in a constrained environment.”

I was impressed. On further questioning, I learned that he was washing dishes with hot water, under his wife’s supervision.

Lunch Time: As I walked out of the deli shop with a roast beef sandwich, large chips, ear of corn & a jumbo sausage, a homeless man sat there and said: ‘I’ve not eaten for two days.’

I told him: ‘I wish I had your willpower.’

From Colman Collins: Three Dublin oul wan’s were discussing what they wanted from their husband’s for Christmas.

The first one said she was some hoping for some bangles and a locket.

The second one said she was hoping for a fur coat.

The third one wasn’t saying anything so the other two said “Maisy – what do you want from your fella for Christmas?’

“The Widow’s pension!”

From Cillian Mooney: “If I had a euro for every woman who found me unattractive, i’d have enough money now for someone to find me attractive.” 

Check our website http://www.tandemconsulting.ie or call 087 2439019 for an informal discussion about executive or organization development.