Most people have a natural desire to be right and in the know.
However, looking like you’re right and actually being right are two different things.
A lot of people ask me questions about how to be perceived as authoritative, as a leader, and as an expert.
I get far fewer questions about how to actually be an expert, be a leader, and be naturally authoritative.
One way to actually be effective is to be open to being wrong.
The best leaders actively seek out others that will tell them when they are wrong.
Here’s a way you can phrase your statement to do the same:
“My understanding about XYZ issue is _____. Tell me what’s wrong, incomplete, or imprecise about my understanding.”
When people ask a question like this what they’re doing is verbalizing a “mental model” (e.g., their conceptual understanding of how something works) and asking for someone more knowledgeable to improve their understanding of the concept.
Here’s an example:
“Here’s my understanding of how artificial intelligence and Language Learning Models (LLM) like ChatGPT work. The computer code is scanning millions of text documents written by human beings. It is looking for a pattern in terms of which words, phrases, and concepts tend to occur together.
For example, the AI system might notice that when the word ‘good’ is used in human writings, it tends to be followed by words like ‘morning,’ ‘job,’ and ‘day mate.’
The system detects that the word ‘good’ is often used in phrases like ‘good morning,’ ‘good job,’ and ‘good day mate.’ It further notices that if a pattern of words related to morning like ‘10:00 a.m.,’ ‘breakfast,’ or ‘go to work’ are used, then the phrase ‘good morning’ is more likely to be the case than ‘good job.’
Is my understanding of Language Learning Models correct? If I’m misunderstanding something, what did I get wrong?”
You’ll see effective executives engage in this kind of discussion and inquiry.
To be an executive with good decision-making skills, you have to comprehend that which you’re making decisions about.
The only way to do that is to continually improve your understanding of relevant topics. The only way to do that is to be open to being wrong (and ask others to help you understand when that’s the case).
What do you think about this issue? Comment below to let me know.
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2 thoughts on “Open to Being Wrong”
I could not agree more. I think, in today’s world, ‘being wrong’ is perceived to be a sign of weakness and not a trait a leader or someone in an authoritative role should be seen with [I used the term ‘perceived’ on purpose] It is believed that it would hinder any chance of upwards movement in the organisation. However, being wrong, or showing that you’re actually wanting to learn from others who are far better suited to talk you through the subject at hand, demonstrates your ‘security’. One is not shying away from asking what was wrong, rather asking to be corrected. As a leader, one is faced to make many decisions in a given day, and an effective decision-maker understands that he/she needs all the relevant facts, and more importantly the accurate facts, to make the right decision.
Thank you for this message. The title has caught me up.
I believe that allowing myself to be wrong is one of the things that have given me most of the most interesting opportunities in my life. I always say that everyone can find a good answer but not everyone can ask a good question. In fact, many people are afraid to show that they don’t know something because they perceive it as a vulnerability. I see a lot of my peers in class staying silent while they know they need to ask a question to enhance their understanding. Plus, today with the democratization of AI, it feels like people are fleeing towards the answers. They miss the opportunity to deeper their understanding and develop personal insights while they are navigating the area of ignorance or misunderstanding.
There is misconceptions to break here for sure !