Beware the unsourced quote. For instance, the quotation, "People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care" has been attributed to many people over the years including President Theodore Roosevelt, Earl Nightingale, and John Maxwell.
While I don’t know who said it first, I do believe the adage is true. Compassion is about caring. Especially when it comes to networking.
Once upon a time when I was president of a large advertising agency I had an employee tell me she was fantastic at networking. I took her to a chamber of commerce meeting and watched her as she said hello and gave her business card to 130 people in one hour.
I thought, “I must never take her to another networking event again.”
Why? Because she was only thinking of herself, and not the impact she was having on other people.
I caught up with Dr. Debra Dupree to get her thoughts on the subject. Growing up in a family-owned business exposed Dupree firsthand to the impact leaders have on those around them. Combined with being one of nine children on the younger end of things, she saw quickly how the moods of her dad and grandfather rippled through the family, creating chaos, disruption and confusion. She observed how the effects of those in charge set the tone for how the family functioned in their tasks and with each other.
“Why is it that a country who consumes 25% of the world’s resources is facing an epidemic of loneliness, anxiety and depression?” asks Dupree. “It’s an epidemic that comes not out of economic loss but from a loss of compassion and lack of meaningful social connection.”
What is compassion and what can we do about it while networking at business events?
“Compassion is a recognition of someone’s suffering and wanting to do something about it,” says Dupree.
Maybe you should have your radar on for how other people are doing. Sometimes the right encouraging words can mean a great deal.
“It sounds like Mother Theresa, right?” says Dupree. “We admire her, but do we want to live our life like hers? Who wants to give more than they get, or more than they feel they can handle?”
Dupree says we hold back in showing compassion because we “fear it will take more than what we can give and more than what we can handle.”
Dupree shared three simple tips for bringing compassion into your networking:
Be Aware Of How You Show Up. “Your presence matters in how you connect with others, how you listen, and how you engage. Be aware of how you show up with others.”
Know That Your Mood Is Contagious. “Live in the light, love on the day and give out joy in every way! Be mindful of how you start your day. Your mood is contagious and ripples through the organization. So start it off in good spirits.”
You Get What You Give. “Practice the Law of Reciprocity. You need to give to get back. And, watch out for what you give, as you might just get it back.”
“Compassion is an expression of empathy,” says Dupree. “And, when combined with an act or show of empathy, it becomes powerful and lights up our brain in ways that closely resembles the emotion of love. And, when we feel love, we feel good. So, the question is this. How do you want to show up? Cold-hearted or warm-hearted? Sort of a no-brainer, right?”
A networking no-brainer indeed.
