You get to write the Last Chapter

As an executive coach, I get to work with people at all careers stages.  25- year-olds launching into their first managerial role with all the normal anxiety which accompanies transitions (“Should I keep going to the Friday Night Beer sessions with the lads?”).  40-year-olds jockeying for the corner office (“Am I good enough?”).  And, those approaching 60, trying to figure out the next chapter (“Can I do another lap, somewhere else?”).

Developing Options:  The process of coaching people facing retirement is actually fairly straightforward.  We normally chat about the past to get a sense of the type of work people have enjoyed.  We talk about the present, focusing on remedial issues they want to fixor ‘bucket list’ items to be progressed. In terms of the future – we mine unfinished business or explore brand new avenues to be travelled.  At the early stage of the process, the task is to divergei.e. consider a wide range of possibilities – along with the upsides/downsides of each.  It’s easier to remove stuff from a list than add to it. So we brainstorm every possibility, knowing that some ideas won’t make the final cut. Of course, we have to ensure that the basics are covered i.e. the client has the mortgage paid and has finally waved ‘goodbye’ (financially) to the kids! (“The bank of Mammy and Daddy is now, officially, closed”)

Doing Nothing:  When developing the list of possibilities, a do nothing option is normally inserted as a standard placeholder. Every day can be a Duvet Day for those who retire. For the 1st time in their life, they can mute the alarm and wake naturally. What percentage of people actually choose this? After a lifetime of hard slog, thousands of early morning starts and three zillion air miles, how many executives plump for the easy life?  Almost no-one.  In his autobiography (Born to Run) Bruce Springsteen said: “The possibility of everything is just ‘nothing’ dressed up in a monkey suit.”

What’s Next? Executives may not want to take on another 9-5 job (or more realistically, an 8-8 role). Sometimes, they don’t even want to work 5-days every week.  But they do want to work, in the sense of being engaged in something important, an activity that provides structure in their life.  For most people, the only way they can really enjoy Saturday/Sunday is the feeling that this time-out was earned earlier in the week. They like to ‘earn their lazy’ and adhere to the Dylan Thomas school of philosophy, expressed in his poem: ‘Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night”…

“Do not go gentle into that good night

Old age should burn and rave at close of day

Rage, rage against the dying of the light”

Better Navigation:  Perhaps some people are better able to navigate this phase than others. If you are getting close of this era in your life, you have several options…

DIY: Take some time out. Read books about retirement.

Structured: Sign up for a retirement course (have a look at DCU’s 3^rdLife programme).

Coaching: Talk to someone externally who can ‘walk you through this’ and develop a customized solution for you.

For sure, there’s life after retirement.  But, for some people it’s a shitty life, devoid of meaning and a sense of doing something centrally important. Take control of the final chapter in the same way that you took control of the earlier phases of your life. In this particular case (health issues permitting), you get to write the ending to the book.

Paul

PS Lighter Note: Bumper Time: The other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said: “Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break?” He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a “Nazi.” He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a “doughnut-eating Gestapo.”He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn’t care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said ‘Trump in 2021.’

Doctor Visit: The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I ache all over. Everywhere I touch it hurts.”

The doctor replies, “OK. Touch your elbow.”

The guy touches his elbow and winces in genuine pain.

The doctor, surprised, then states, “Touch your head.”

The guy touches his head and jumps in agony. The doctor asks him to touch his knee and the same thing happens. Everywhere the guy touches he hurts like hell. The doctor is stumped and orders a complete examination with X-rays, etc. and tells the guy to come back in two days. Two days later the guy comes back and the doctor declares: “We’ve found your problem.”

“What is it?”asks the retiree.

“You’ve broken your finger!”

Boom Boom: Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.

The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they have a common enemy.

Money isn’t everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children.

Suggested Senior Citizen Remixes

“You’re So Varicose Vein” Carly Simon

“How Can You Mend A Broken Hip?” Bee Gees

“I Can’t See Clearly Now” Johnny Nash

“These Boots Give Me Arthritis” Nancy Sinatra

“Once, Twice, Three Trips to the Bathroom” The Commodores

“I Get By with a Little Help from Depends” Beatles

“Talking’ Bout My Medication” The Who

“Bald Thing” Troggs

“You Can’t Always Pee When You Want” Rolling Stones

From Aidan Cahill:The Importance Of An Occupation After Retirement

As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to ‘Make a difference’ in the world. It’s at these times that our hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other Seniors who have found the courage to take on challenges that would make many of us wither. Harold Schlumberg is such a person:“I’ve often been asked: ‘What do you do now that you’re retired?’  Well…I’m fortunate to have a chemical engineering background and one of the things I enjoy most is converting beer, wine and whiskey into urine. It’s rewarding, uplifting, satisfying and fulfilling. I do it every day and I really enjoy it.” 

Harold, an Inspiration to us all!

Holidays:  On a trip to Ibiza, my husband went Bungee jumping. As his body hit the rocks below, I thought to myself:  “That’ll teach you to lie about your weight.”

Check our website http://www.tandemconsulting.ie or call 087 2439019 for an informal discussion about executive or organization development.