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The Importance of Making Friends in your Consulting Firm

I don’t remember anyone talking about it back when I was recruiting for consulting, but I have noticed that one major contributing factor to consulting workplace satisfaction is having friends at the firm. By friends, I don’t mean the typical “workplace friends” that you get along with at work, get coffee with, and maybe go to a work happy hour with every now and then. By friends I mean the people willing to take some of their personal time after work to come over for dinner or go to a comedy show on the weekend. I mean people that you’ll probably be happy to invite to your wedding. More than anything, I mean people who value you beyond your professional attributes.

I began to think about this after talking to many of my graduate school peers who started their post-MBA careers in consulting. I saw that for many, their consulting firm is viewed through the lens of being a responsibility that they committed to and not a social opportunity. Sure, a lot of people in this group may find their work meaningful and exciting, but at the end of the day their consulting firm is a job. What brings them true joy is what they do outside of work because that is where they find their delightful social moments.

Yet, I found that those who are most happy are those that see their consulting firm as an opportunity to build and strengthen bonds with true friends. These friends not only make work more pleasant, but have lasting value in that they transcended into people’s personal lives. Even if the work is less than thrilling, they know that they have people around them to make life better.

Why Making Friends Is Important

1. Happiness

More than anything, it is emotionally healthier to enter consulting knowing that it can be a source of strong social bonds. Consulting is frequently all-consuming, and so without friends by your side it can be extraordinarily exhausting. This is especially true as free time is often less accessible by virtue of the workload.

I have definitely seen people driven by ambition power through consulting careers with great success. However, I have found among my peers that the happiest are those who view their firm as a place where they have an opportunity to build meaningful friendships.

2. Professional Support

Having strong friendships in a consulting firm has professional benefits. Supportive colleagues of any stripe can be truly helpful. However, having a robust group of friends can provide a support network who will be willing to invest significant time giving unfiltered advice. This can be career defining. Perspectives are often best delivered when hard truths are spoken plainly. Clear and honest feedback can be hard to hear, and it is most well received coming from friends.

Firm Dynamics that Foster Friendship

Obviously, making friends at work depends on your making an effort. However, firms can also create an environment that nurtures friendship.

1. Sustaining an Open Collegial Culture

The firm can promote a culture that encourages open communication and networking across the firm. This nudges people to be receptive towards engaging colleagues beyond the dynamics of project work. After all, true friendships transcend projects.

2. Investing in Community Social Bonds

It helps tremendously if a firm regularly invests in events where a cross-section of colleagues can come together and socialize. Generally, these events are gatherings of under 50 people such as a large group dinner or happy hour social event where there is no agenda on the table.

These kinds of events give people a break from the extensive hours of project work, but also offer prime grounds for meeting people and building social connections.

3. Establishing Hiring Cohorts

It also helps if a firm establishes a cohort system to socialize new hires into the firm. For new hires who don’t know that many people, an organized cohort offers a built-in network where friend-making can spontaneously happen. In contrast, at firms where new hires are just dropped in without being provided a structured community, it is logistically much more difficult to meet different people and make those friendships.

What This Is All About

Ultimately, a consulting career is not a sprint, it is more like doing a Spartan Race (a multi-challenge endurance race) that happens over and over again. With proper training and preparation, each leg of the race will be tough but doable. However, with friends along for the ride, it becomes a fulfilling adventure.

I highly recommend making your consulting career a series of interesting adventures and not just a series of endless races to whatever comes next.

Hall Wang is a dual degree MBA and Master of Public Policy graduate from Georgetown University who has recently matriculated into a major management consulting firm. He has worked at America’s most innovative companies including Blue Origin and Facebook, as well as having done two combat deployments as a US Army Officer.

Image: Pixabay

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